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“The way “.
It has been called that in many
places and by many cultures long gone.
It is called that by some people presently. It may be called that in the future or by
some other name. It is a way of looking
at things. It is a path leading from and
to other things. The things we pick and
choose to look at. Each heart determines
the path and the choice. The way helps
make us see things in a new light.
The syncopated beat of the moving
feet of the camel, that desert beast, through the eternal sands reaches a tone,
a resonance that only a chosen few, those who can listen, who can only hear.
Our lord Zoraster heard and
understood it a thousand years ago, this magic sound, this mystical undying
message. The energy of motion, the
journey, the quest calls out quietly ahead of the trail and beckons us forward
and onward.
Those who attain the perfection, the
ultimate state of being that a mere mortal on this spec of dust can
achieve…understand the “way” unique to themselves and only by example can try
to explain to others.
My focus on the “way” drifts to a
memory. As a child, my father, my adopted father, stood next to me at the foot
of the great pyramid in Egypt.
“The visitors come in the day” he
began to explain to me. “They see the rising sun’s golden light on the polished
white stone. The feel of warmth, the golden light and some see evidence of a
sun god.
Many see the geometry and measure the
angle of shadows and record them. Then they try to predict the meaning of the
universal symbols that accompany angles and shadows…and in the night, in
starlight or moonlight, some see the likeness of the moon goddess. Behold a mountain of stone. Behold the heart of all. Truth is revealed in a whisper by the creating
forces of the universe…”
Oh, how my father gave me such a
headache at times. He delivered the full truth and on knowledge of so much on
everything he knew. He shared with this small girl the full truth of everything
that he knew. Thought I did not understand all at the time, I remember every
word and every moment in his magnificent presence.
For it was he, who came from the
east, that bought me from my real parents. I see a blur in my memory of them. I
remember some of their language and have had some use of it through the years.
Though I was born near here in that
eternally troubled strip of stone and desert, I have only rested on that soil
since then at night when the caravans stop to rest amidst my many travels.
The sun is setting outside the shaded
covering of my cloth enclosure atop this camel companion. We will be stopping
soon and I will begin another chapter of this long, long life of a child born a
prodigy.
A pang of anxiety fills my heart for
the fear of the unknown of things to come and the loss of familiar comfortable
things. What to do? Change thoughts? Adjust the measure of breath. Relax.
I need to meditate. Breathe slowly.
Focus on the center of energy that the great master Buddha from the Far East
has taught us.
It is remembered what is written in
the sacred texts I possess handed down to me only from my father. That first of
all, in the scheme of things, first came the great Zoroaster, a caravan owner. He moved goods over land and shared the
knowledge of the “way” from place to place in the desert and elsewhere.
A caravan, with its many camels and
masters, is like a mighty fleet of ships at sea. There is need for the skills and mastery of a
great admiral over many good captains. The years of experience of good captains
and the admiral are too many to count.
Like the great masters of the past, there
is only one or two who have the skill in any one generation or in a generation
of generations who can know of, or seek the handle of the sacred door, the door
behind which holds all knowledge of the universe…
Breathe in. Hold. Breathe out. Not
the best place to be doing the breathing on top of the living boat of a camel.
Its breath should be the dominant breath, cadence, a signal, and a coach to
follow. Reach the calm. Touch and see the light. Attain the wonderful nirvana.
I am back in focus, back in time with
my great teacher.
“There is an opposite to everything.
The yin and the yang they call it in the lands beyond India. There is white
across from the black. There is life; there is death. There…”
My mind merges with the image of the
light of a full moon rising and reflected on the marble surface of the great
pyramid. The cold of the night still sends shivers up my spine from many years
ago.
The whole of the moon, gray on white,
the iridescence of light, is a part to the dark sky. My mind’s eye view is a
staircase to the stars.
My thoughts connect with a timeless
time. Reconnect with this sight frozen
in my memory as we stood alone at the base of this man made mountain. We stood
there and shared with unknown others, through thousands of years gone by, this
same experience. That memory somehow grounds me in times of anxiety. It anchors my mind and creates a safe port
for the feelings in my heart.
Those others, those countless others,
priests of the pharaoh, pharaohs themselves, those of the “way”, are in some
strange fashion still there as I connect to that memory. In my heart I feel the
sensation of the lord master who stood in the same place and in a different
time and saw the same moon make a similar sight…it is the touchstone of my spiritual
being, one of the touchstones of my being, along with the other few that are
perhaps too secret to share with anyone, anywhere, and even bridging time.
Historians write that they visited
the pyramids in Egypt. They never describe the mathematics or the geometry.
Perhaps they fear secret societies or secret priesthoods who would jealously
protect and kill to protect the secret mathematics or geometry of the great
universal marker.
The trouble with secret societies is
that secrets can die with a head priest who has not taught or selected well the
apprentices who might one day succeed to head a family, a clan or a brotherhood
of the guardians of trust.
Truth, universal truth, cannot be hidden
forever, no matter how hidden or protected.
The Greeks figured out the
mathematics and geometries that built those ancient Egyptian temples and
monuments. Now the Greeks claim to have invented mathematics and geometry. Such
a crock of camel piss!
I know the secret – the spiritual
secret of the great man made mountain of stone. I know of the spiritual gate to
the stars. I have felt the presence of others not of this mortal realm, here on
this sphere in a void of not so godly aspirations.
The camel has stopped.
I must pause for a few seconds before
regaining orientation to the vulgar world of the living and the flesh.
Fama, my camel driver gives a call. I
reply. Our camel is about to descend to its knees to aid my getting off its
back. It would not be seemly for a man no matter how loyal and respected to
enter the privacy of this woman’s realm of a small tent structure upon the back
of a camel. The warning was to hold on. The camel always moves from side to
side as it kneels and rests on the ground.
I draw a cloth cover back to see the
beginnings of night and others disembarking from their means of travel.
Faint starlight and a few lit torches
are visible.
My maid greets me and I disembark. I
pet the camel on the nose out of respect. She responds in cantankerous fashion.
One must show respect for all living things spoke the great master.
I walk a short distance and sit upon
a chair. In front of my chair has been placed a small rug. As I sit two long
wooden poles go into the desert sand and are parallel and behind me.
J.D., my eunuch, has great strength
and has no need to pound the poles into the desert sand. A cloth with slots in
it is fitted on the poles. At last I am invisible and away from the others in
the caravan who are tending their beasts. Privacy is the hardest part of any
caravan journey. The men are crude and basic. They say vulgar words. They
relieve themselves where they stand after getting off their camels.
I stand.
My maid and eunuch help me bend my
knees onto the rug in front of me. My evening prayers are due to the creator. I
kneel and pray and meditate and rethink things. A small tent is erected about
me. More privacy. Room for a place to sleep. The space within is large enough
for a few trunks out of which come clothes, lotions and other personal items.
My maid, though technically she is my
slave, prepares the sparse sleeping place. She will share the tent with me this
evening and my eunuch will sleep outside the entrance to my tent.
Although I personally know the
caravan master and many of the drivers, there are those hired at the last
minute to drive the camels and cargo that one cannot be sure of.
My maid brings a lit lamp into the
tent and places it on a small table. My prayers are at an end. I would prefer
to assume the lotus position and begin a few moments of meditation in the style
of the Buddha.
These cross disciplines of the
prayers of one belief system mixed with the rituals of another might seem not
right to some. I know how the “way” has changed over the ages. These caravans
touch the distances and bring gossips of what is new and different from
elsewhere.
Things have changed at this end of
the caravan map’s destination. A thousand years ago the Greeks and Romans were
still living in caves and were nothing more than shepherds and goatherds.
Back then, Persia was at her zenith
and a navel of a whole world. To the east lay what? The unknown territories lay
there and the great Alexander had yet to be born and conquer them. He and his
Greeks were yet to absorb and steal other ideas and beliefs.
The secrets continue. We, the
priestly class of Zoroaster, no longer have Persia. We still hold the truth of
our great prophet.
Rome, and its marble temples and
marble gods in marble cities, is a culture of stone. No true blood within that
growing beast. Only the bloodshed from with out. The Romans have great drive.
They have no great passion except to imitate a dominating male culture of
animals, their dogs. Man and woman in nature are indeed a notch or two above
the animals and the so-called Roman Empire.
A light meal of dates and yogurt is
served to me and a cup of wine saturated with medicinal herbs. Traveling does
such a number on my internal organs. Travel on camels is for the young and the
hearty.
This may be my last journey. It was
taken in great haste. A power struggle had developed between my evil brother in
law and my son for the hearts and minds of those few last hard-core followers
of our faith.
Zoran, the by blood high priest of
our religion, has of late been campaigning to eliminate my son’s claim as a
rightful heir to the high priesthood. Zoran’s claim of my impure blood mixed
with the son of the last high priest, my husband, wants only his sons to
succeed him. Pity that my husband died at such an early age, and pity my father
was not here to work his potent language and magic on Zoran.
The secret brotherhood of Zoroaster
is a pale reflection of its past self and glory.
Percepolis, the once mighty capital
of Persia has been in ruins for centuries. The center of our faith is a small
town some distance to the north of Percepolis. It is a town of mud huts and not
so grand palaces of the dying priesthood.
The center of pilgrimage is still the
ancient city. Though abandoned, one mighty temple in ruins is where we gather
twice a year to do ancient rituals, rekindle the sacred flame and read from the
sacred texts.
I smirk. I am amused. I have the
knowledge of many sacred texts. I know the places of secret repositories of
writings. Deserts are wonderful places to hide the sacred writings in jars
buried in the sand or hidden in secret caves.
Zoran thinks he knows all the
secrets. He is wrong. My magic is merely insight and intuition. Perhaps Zoran
is right about my impure blood. Perhaps only blood of blood can invoke the
ancient magic of the Magi. Who am I to say?
I had hoped that at this late stage
of my life to entrust documents to my son.
My father and husband had entrusted those writings to me for him to
receive them but only when he was ready to handle their potent knowledge. It is a great burden to have so much
potential power and not be able to use it. Not once has any official priestess
of Zoroaster ever been elevated to the role of high priestess. It is that old
cultural male, female thing.
Though, if I were younger and more
ambitious, I might have tried for such a role in the hierarchy of my religion.
But Zoran is right. I am an outsider. It is not likely for me to succeed but my
son has the blood of many great masters in his veins. He is rightful heir to
the high priesthood and only to a true high priest can I bestow the ancient
legacy of secrets and sacred writings.
I drink another cup of wine. This is
mixed with the ground up seeds of the cannabis plant. I need my rest and my
aging bones ache after being bounced around on the back of my sister camel all
day long.
How many more days until I reach my
destination?
Zoran wants the Rome to rebuild
Percepolis. He has invited them into Persia. They are not likely to come. They
have to conquer and rape and dominate cultures and environments and reshape
them into their image of the grand Roman city.
Zoran waits for a miracle and help
from the Romans to resurrect the grandeur and glory of our religion. It is
perhaps a dead religion now if it depends on the likes of the Romans for help.
The Romans cannot measure or conquer
the desert sands very well. They cannot build roads that will be stable in the
sands. They cannot keep the sands away from hiding their marvelous roads. Roads
are their lifeline and also their limit.
Here in the desert, these few hearty
souls, these camel drivers are more powerful and more respected than a hundred
Roman legions.
I drift off to sleep. I regret
leaving my son alone in his quest among the brethren for the trust and respect
to gain the high priesthood. My presence was a sore point for him. I decided to
disappear for a while. I had some loose ends to tie together. I needed to
discover my true roots near here in that land near the coast of the great sea,
great sea…
I dream.
I am in a boat. It not unlike the
boats that took my father and me up and down the Nile. We are not on a river
but a much greater body of water. The wind comes and the darkness, then thunder
and then lightning.
I am alone on this boat. No sailors
are present to guide the boat through the storm. I will probably perish in the
storm.
Then there comes a calm in the middle
of the storm. With the calm comes a warmth felt within the whole of my body. I
see a distant light and I hear a voice.
A male voice speaks. “I am the way.”
The dream ends.
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